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I saw this headline and thought this describes my son and his friends so much I had to write.

I am the first to admit that they definately all look different! My son is 15 nearly 16 years old. His hair is shoulder length, dyed jet black with a red 'splash' across his fringe, he wears thick black eyeliner, skintight black jeans, black converse trainers, black t-shirts with various obscure band names on the front teamed with a long black, leather coat. You get the picture? I am sure theer are a lot of people out there who, on seeing a group of teenagers like this walking towards them would cross the road, muttering to themselves 'I hope my children don't turn out like that' Other teenagers refer to them here in the UK as 'Emo' short for emotional. There is this preconceived idea that they are all suicidal, that they self-harm, are depressive, moody, sinister, take drugs, drink, the list could go on. Let me describe to you the real side of their personalities.

They are a caring group of young men. My son is one of the happiest, emotionally stable, sensible boys I know. He is happy to come shopping with me if I need a hand. He will sit and talk to me while I am cooking, if he has a problem he tells me straight away, he has never had a suicidal thought in his life - he says he loves his life too much for that! Considering he is a teenager he isn't moody, he has never self-harmed and actually brings his friends home on a Sunday afternoon to sit and chat with me! I think the fact that his little sister and I bake on a Sunday morning might have something to do with that though!
My son and his friends say they have never taken drugs, I believe them, have never had any reason not to. I also know they don't drink, they have fallen out with friends over drinking, will lecture other teenagers about the downfalls of alcohol! Yes really! They say they cannot understand why people want to go out and get so wasted that they can't remember what they have done. They like to go and watch bands, say alcohol and drugs would only spoil the performance for them, they want to enjoy and remember every last moment. My son even offers to babysit his little sister so that I can go out! He did want to get his lip/eyebrow/tongue pierced but has accepted that the rules at his school do not permit body piercings therefore he is waiting until he leaves school, he respects the rules. He has 100% school attendance record, is predicted A and B grades in all the 11 GCSEs he sits next year, he sat 2 this year, a year early, we are yet to get his results for these.
I asked him why he dresses like he does, his reply was simple, 'it's about being an individual and dressing for myself not just following everyone else like sheep' he went on 'a lot of the kids at school admitted they don't really like alcohol, they just drink to stay in with the in crowd and are frightened of being different. I'm not frightened of being different, you bought me up to be myself and that's what I am doing.' I felt really proud of him over that statement.
So, to all parents out there, if your teenager comes home and wants to dye their hair black, starts to wear dark make-up and dark clothes, don't automatically think the worst. Be proud that you have bought up your son/daughter to be a person who is confident enough about who they are to stand out in a crowd! Support their change in image, you could be pleasantly surprised! Respect between parents and teenagers does need to be a mutual thing, respect your teenager and he/she will respect you. I have a relationship with my son that a lot of my friends envy, it's mutual respect.

Learn more about this author, Tracie Anne.
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