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The childhood memories I have are so very cruel and have caused me ample grief in my life. I remember running from my father into women's shelters ever since I was little enough to remember anything. I remember my father abusing my older sister to the point I was terrified of the man. Is this the way you are supposed to feel about your father? Is it right to have horrific family memories of growing up in fear of the drunken stupor your father will be in tonight? I don't think God intended children to have those kinds of memories. Some of my memories are suppressed so deeply I can't find them anymore.

A Poem dedicated to my DAD:
For when you go to bed tonight you may get a big scare,
When you try to close your eyes your drunken father is there.
What will he do or who will he hit; is it you he's looking for,
You look around trying to judge how far is the bedroom door.

You know you may need to make a wild dash just in time,
To stop him from touching someway that is a scary crime.
You cringe and cry; to scared to move; squeeze your eyes,
Hoping tonight is not another one of those nightly goodbyes.

I hope your good enough to read between the lines because there is a lot more going on there. Fathers are someone you should trust but mine was not. He was a monster and my mom was so beaten down it took her 14 yrs to leave the monster behind and run to far far away land. Ha Ha Ha. I praise my mom but still have trouble understanding why she didn't stop him from beating us. She didn't know about the other part but she did know he beat us kids. I think because he wanted boys and we were born the wrong sex.
He is a lonely old man dying now. He will never meet his grandchildren. Too bad but how can you feel sorry for him.

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