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pappy taught me how, hell child, I don't answer to nobody but the Lord. And he aint even been around here lately. Do you see the Lord? I asked wonderedly, I was curious because I only seen his pictures. She laughed happily and said, "Child when it rains, that's the Lord, when its sunny that's the Lord, the stars in the sky! That's the Lord, he all around." "Well how come you said he hasn't been around lately"? "Well now girl, my days on earth have been long, and my lord is hidin because he's comin to get me, and he wants it to be a surprise, kinda like a birthday party,ya know there around ,ya just don't see em, and thens all of sudden surprise! And you's happy as can be. Yep my lord and master are comin to get me soon, oh child I can't wait to see my mammy and pappy again, and sit next to my true master. While I listened to her I realized how much I liked her, and how I was going to miss her, I think I even loved her, she was the first grown up to talk to me and not at me. And the way she spoke of her family was something I never felt. I was so warmed by her, that I thought I could stay with her forever. Seconds later, my new found happiness turned to shame, as I heard my Papa yelling for me to get off that niggers porch, I looked up at her with shame and sadness in my eyes, tears welling, she patted my back and said quietly, love yourself child and you be alright, I hesitated, all the while my Grandfather was yelling out horrible things, she nudged me forward, don't worry we see each other again, I'll save you a seat next to mine with our lord. I never saw here again after that day, I suppose she died shortly after. We shared a bond that changed my life forever. A bond that changed the heart and soul I didn't know I had. I was born free, white, and racists. The shame I felt was overwhelming and the words from the old woman love yourself and you'll be alright stayed in my mind forever. She was right loving myself gave me the courage despite my family upbringing to love all people of every color. I saw the lord that day. His face looked like a roadmap, ashy black in color, matted hair, and kind eyes and he could make a mean tart glass of lemonade.

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