by C.L. Bennett

Created on: July 19, 2007

The road hazards along the great dating highway are plentiful. Adding into the equation another drawback, such as a larger body, can present even greater obstacles for the single woman. As women in today's society, we all want to fit into the mold presented by the media and the masses, and we stop looking at our individual beauty. I myself am a larger woman by societal standards. And yet, I've never had a big problem with dating. Sure, there are some guys who just don't feel attracted to me. And that's ok, because there are plenty of them I am not attracted to.

I think that the majority of larger women simply lack the most fundamental of ingredients for a good dating life. Confidence and presence. I'll explain by sharing a story. My sister is gorgeous. Thin, pretty face, great hair and a great figure overall. In our younger years, we would go out to clubs and various other hot spots. Invariably, she would spend hours getting ready, trying to get the just right look and the perfect curl in her hair. I usually just brushed my straight hair out and slapped on some lip gloss to accompany my favorite jeans that would encase my too big bottom.

And yet, despite our divergent approaches, not to mention our different body images, we each attracted about the same amount of attention. You see, I accepted that my butt was too big, my belly to soft and my hair was straight. I was ok with it, was sure somewhere out there were men who enjoyed a fuller figure and straight hair. My confidence showed, it was obvious that I was content with myself. And that was apparently appealing to more men than you might think.

Not all men want the high maintenance woman, the ones who need several layers of paint and two bottles of hairspray just to go to the grocery. And not all men want thin and slender. Some men actually prefer a woman who doesn't show ninety percent of her skin. Lucky me! There are enough difficulties for all men and women already ladies. We don't need to pile the problem pile higher with our insecurities. Stand tall and be proud of who and what you are, no matter your weight. That confidence will show in the way you walk, in the way you make eye contact. And men respond to that.

Be sure to show off your curves in a flattering way. Show your own personal style. Don't get bogged down with makeup, overly chunky jewelry and big hair in an effort to 'hide' your weight. It doesn't work and only sends the message that you need these things to feel better about yourself. Be you. It's that simple. Accent and flatter and show some style, and above all stand tall.

If you are hiding behind your weight, thinking you'll never get a date or that you'll only get the left over desperate men, then that is exactly what you WILL get. Expect more. Demand it with your confidence and your own self respect.

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