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funeral and going through the motions with a shattered heart.

I spent months of despair, depression anger, guilt, sorrow...and all the possible negative feelings one goes through as they grieve. I was in a living death everyday. Friends went away, people began to disappear & I felt as lonely as a human can feel. It's easier to live in a dark and damp pit of sadness when tragedy strikes than it is to force a smile to refrain from making others feel uncomfortable around you. And so that's the route I chose. I missed out on many of the things that make life worth living and I was ok with that, but eventually I began to wake up.

After long months of regrouping and getting a grip on myself, I realized that I wasnt alone. All along my little boy and my husband had been there waiting for me, longing to hear me laugh and wishing to see the twinkle in my eye that had been lost in the darkness. With their patience and unconditional love, they brought me back to life even though I felt that my pain was inconsolable.

Today, Camila's headstone reads the words of the song that I sang to her when I held her in my arms, there's a picture of her and an engraved illustration that I drew of my husband, my son and I holding our Angel Camila in our arms. We have a memorial on her Birthday every year, a very private day of nostalgia and surrealism that we cherish immensely. She's part of our lives each and every day, our time with her ended when she passed away, but she is and will always be alive to us when we close our eyes and think of our beautiful little girl.

My daughter is alive in my memories and my heart.

Learn more about this author, Carolina S.G..
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