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Daddy's little girl,
with curly locks of gold.
Wanting to make him happy,
doing what I was told.

I tried to be a good girl,
didn't want to make him mad.
But somehow, I could never do right,
guess I was just born bad.

At time it seemed he loved me so much,
he would spend all his time with me.
He said I was his princess,
he was as proud as he could be.

Back then I was too little,

To see his other side.
The side so dark and evil,
that he tried so hard to hide.

I was so young and innocent,
I did not see his wrongs.
To me it was all normal,
I was blinded all along.

It was not until I was older,
that I realized,
that all the things I thought was true,
were just his dirty lies.

I dared not confess to him,
that I knew things weren't right.
Instead I buried it all inside,
and did not try to fight.

In the day my life was picturesque
for all the world to see.
But at night, when the world was sleeping,
was when he'd come to me.

Not daddy who taught me to throw a ball,
or took me to the park.
But the evil one who killed my soul
and made me fear the dark.

He said I was his princess,
and belonged to only him.
And so I did what I was told,
and fulfilled his every whim.

A good girl does what daddy says,
and does not question why.
So i closed my eyes,
and held my breath,
and buried all my cries.

My mommy always closed her eyes,
so that she wouldn't feel.
I guess it made it easier,
it made it all less real.

UNTIL ONE DAY
when the hurt and anger
all caught up with me.
I opened my heart
and opened my eyes
to what I did not want to see.

I saw who my daddy REALLY was,
not who I had wanted him to be.
I saw all the anger and dirty lies,
and the monster that came to me.

He had violated my very soul,
destroying my ability to trust.
He had taken an innocent loving child,
and made me an object of lust.

I tried to open my mothers eyes too,
so that she would protect me from him.
But instead she denied me
and turned me away,
to hide from her own sins.

With hickies on my neck and chest
and bruises on my thighs
My mommy sent me to my room
to think about my lies,
and daddy was there waiting,
lying across my bed.
He said when he was through with me
I'd wish that I were dead.

He said he'd make me sorry,
he said he'd make me pay,
He asked why I betrayed him,
he said he'd never go away.

After that I was no princess,
at barely just thirteen
I had become his punching bag
and he was more obscene.

Now he loved to humiliate me,
even in front of strangers
At home you should feel safe,
but that was my greatest danger

One day I fought back
while he was beating me
I thought that he might kill me,
then I would be free.

I remember her blank stare
when I ran out the door.
And I will never forget
his piercing screams,
calling me a whore.

I have never returned,
to that hell I once called home.
Instead in my own mind,
I have another hell to roam.

With so much anger,
and hatred,
and feelings to hide.
I wonder
if my pain,
will EVER
subside.

Flashbacks forever
take me back to that place.
Where my childhood was stolen,
where I see his evil face.

I long to make him hurt
for all the ways that he hurt me,
and for making me a victim
as I will forever be.

Learn more about this author, Chris Dixon.
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