Being in love isn't easy in the best case. Loving an alcoholic can make a relationship a great deal more difficult.

It is incredibly painful to watch someone you love drink themselves incoherent every night. They know they have a problem but can't seem to do anything about it. They know that they are hurting you, and that makes them hate themselves even more. You feel useless to help them; the best you can do is always be there for them.

Every day is a constant battle of emotions. Sometimes you're angry at them for what they do to you and to themselves. Other times you fear that they are slowly killing themselves and there's nothing you can do to stop it. At times you blame yourself for not being able to help them; still other times you try to accept their problem as apart of who they are.

It can be very difficult for other people to understand and be supportive of your feelings. Family and friends might have only negative things to say about the person you love, which can be incredibly hurtful. They simply don't understand why you stay with someone who puts you through so much day after day. Of course, this can cause tense relationships between you and some of the people who are closest to you.

There's no question about it; loving someone who has a drinking problem can cause a lot of stress and heartcache. But when you love someone, you love them completely. You love them in spite of what they do to themselves, and what they do to you. You know that they care about you, even though it doesn't always feel like it. The fear of losing someone to drinking makes you realize even more how important they are to you. Sometimes it is hard to have hope for the future, but you never give up. Most importantly, you hold them close and let them know how much they mean to you. Because if anything will help them, it's knowing how much you really care. They also know that even if they don't change, you will love them anyway. In the end, that's what matters the most.

Learn more about this author, T. Marie.
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