In this day and age I think it is very important that our teenage children have rules that they need to follow. However, there should not be a rule about every single aspect of their lives, they need to be allowed to make some mistakes so that they can grow to become more responsible adults.

The most important rules should be that they are honest with you at all times and that they respect you.

You need to have realistic expectations of your teenager, their age, maturity, social life and family values will help determine what those expectations should be and then you need to discuss them with your child.

I think that during school holidays teenagers should be given a little bit more freedom, remember they are a year older than they were last summer, discuss this openly and be prepared to compromise a little.

Then you need to have what I call the 'I promise I won't blow my top' policy. Your child needs to be able to talk to you about anything and to know that you won't immediately explode. My rule with my children is that they have to warn me that it's one of those moments, so far I have found that what they saw as being very serious was never as bad as I expected.

My final bit of advice is this, never discipline when you are angry or upset, cool off, take some time to think and then decide what the next step should be.

Learn more about this author, Ann Somerville.
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