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Short stories: Funny pet stories

The Pet Store

A woman and son walk into a pet store, and are greeted by the manager, who is standing behind the cash register desk.

"Good afternoon, how may I help you?"

The woman turns to him.

"I'd like to buy some fish please."

The son runs off to the back of the store to the small mammal cages. He begins to snatch up the gerbils, putting them down his pants. The woman and the pet store manager do not notice.

"Well what kind of fish would you like?"

"I don't know which kind taste the best?"

The pet store manager is angered by the stupid question, he explains to her with distain.

"This is a pet store ma'am not a grocery store."

The woman isn't fazed by the manager's response the vacancy in her eyes make her look like her brain is on another planet, or was never there to begin with. The woman Points to the gold fish tanks along the wall behind her.

"Oh. Well um what are those gold ones called?"

"Gold fish"

The manager responds with frustration.

"I'll have some of those."

The manager walks out from behind his desk and over to the take that the woman is pointing at. He reaches underneath the shelving the tanks are sitting on and grabs a net and bag.

"How many do you want?"

"Umm, just fill up the bag"

The manager, scoops up some water into the bag; he catches the fish and ties them in. He and the woman walk back to the desk. The son notices his mother getting ready to leave and runs up to her. The woman turned to her son.

"Get the fish."

"But they might bite me."

The manager looks at the kid with surprise.

"I've never known a gold fish to bite, especially through a bag."

"Could you put it in a box please he has been afraid of fish ever since he was mauled by that sea cow in Saskatchewan."

The woman responds in the same monotone spaced out manner. The meager is becoming more angry and frustrated by the second.

"Fine"

The manager grabs a small cardboard box from under the desk; He puts bag of fish in in the box and closes it up.

"Is that all?"

The manager says hopping they are going to leave, but to his dismay the woman seas the puppies in a room with two glass viewing windows, one looking out side, the other into the store.

"You sell dogs. Can I borrow one, to try it out?"

"No, to have to buy it and you have 2 days to return it, if you don't like it and I will refund you 80%."

The manager says hopping she will change her mind and leave.

"80% of the puppy parts?"

The woman says confusedly, the manager by now is very angry with this woman.

"I meant the money."

"Oh"

"Its $4.50 for the fish."

The woman takes out her credit card and pays the manager and leaves.

"They finally left, now I can have my lunch."

The manager mutters to himself. Shaking his head he reaches behind the desk and pulls out a puppy and begins eating it.

Learn more about this author, Sarah Fortin.
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