by Tom Karlin

Created on: July 04, 2007   Last Updated: January 04, 2008

Don't be fooled; winter is not any fun. If you are getting older and going through a mid-life crisis (remember your parents always talking about it happening to one of their friends or neighbors), then very little in life seems funny.

It is even less amusing if you live in a cold northern climate as I do. My observation is this; if you are getting up in years, then you hate the cold and if you are fortunate enough to be young, you either love the cold or tolerate it better than your parents or grandparents. Does that help you kids understand why Grandpa and Grandma want to move to Florida?

Don't let the outdoor enthusiasts try to fool you with their gung-ho attitude about how many great things there are to do in the winter. There is nothing fun about being outside in subzero weather.

Do you honestly think it is fun skating while your toes are feeling the numbing effects of the beginning stages of frostbite? What about this; have you ever experienced your nose hairs matting together when you breathed in mid January super-cooled air? How about this scenario; have you ever tried to smile outside on a cold winter's day only to have the skin on both sides of your mouth crack? If so, then you know how much that it hurts. Is it funny? I don't think so.

If anyone finds that humorous then they would surely find it hilarious watching someone with cracked and bleeding lips applying layers of lip gloss to help prevent further damage from the blustery bitter cold winter winds. Have you ever had tear drops freeze to your eyelids? Let me tell you it isn't as much fun as it sounds. Let me give you a warning. Wait until you are indoors and let the ice melt, before peeling the frozen particle off. If you pull off the frozen ice droplet while you are still outside, you may be surprised to find a small thin patch of skin coming off as well. Try and guess how that feels when your face begins to warm up again.

I lived in the sunny south for a few years when I was younger. When the weather was really hot I remember often taking a dip in the swimming pool and cooling off before going inside to a comfortably air conditioned apartment. How sweet that was. Now here I am older an so-called wiser, living in this frozen land of snow and ice, with a somewhat different lifestyle. I fatten up during the fall months then hibernate through the winter until the glacier begins to recede. Then because of our extremely long winters, when the summer finally arrives I find it too hot.

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