by Karen Garcia

Created on: July 02, 2007   Last Updated: March 05, 2011

I don't think all women want the same thing. Why do you think there are hundreds of shades of lipsticks available in the market today? Don't even get me started with nail polish...

Seriously, I just don't think that all people, all women, want the same things in life. We are all by-product of our cultural, political, social, and/or spiritual upbringing which will dictate what kind of person we want to have a relationship with. And even people who were raised with similar backgrounds will differ as well. I sure do not want to date men similar to those guys that some of my friends, people that I grew up with, had gone out with.

But here goes what I call the "Man Paradox"

1. Responsible, yet irresponsible. There is no way I will be with a man does not know how to take care of himself. I can't be with a person who don't and won't pick after himself, expect mommy to do wash his laundry, or worse, ask for her money. At the same time I don't mind if he's once in a while "irresponsible." Irresponsible in a way that he won't care if there's a pile of dishes in the sink waiting to be washed because there's something good on TV or he forgets to water his plants.

2. Fun, yet Boring. Sense of humour is one of the things that I want to be surrounded with. I enjoy a good laugh every now and then, I expect him to do the same. How I plan my weekend is as unpredictable as snow in May. There are times I want to go out, drive away and go to the first place that comes in mind, there are times that I just want to stay at home and watch a lot of TV be and a "boring" person.

3. Smart, yet "Dumb." I enjoy books, art, and culture, I at least require a nod and a smile when I talk about that book that I just finished reading. He does not have to be bookish smart but he has to be, on the risk of sounding like a snob, articulate enough to talk to me. At the same time he has to enjoy an afternoon of watching "mindless" entertainment on TV with me.

4. Honest, yet a Liar. Do I look fat? Do these jeans make my butt look big? Ah, the questions with no right answer. Ninety nine percent of the time, I'd expect to be answered with nothing but downright honesty, however he must know well enough to exercise his right to lie...1% of the time. Tell me that I look pretty when I wake up in the morning - uncombed hair, unwashed face and all. Or that everything will be alright when I come home on the verge of tears because I was having a bad day.

5. Feminist, yet sexist. By feminist, I mean "not a chauvinist pig." Someone who does not judge people according to the arrangement of their chromosomes. And by sexist I mean, he can throw in a sexist joke once in a while...as long as they're about men. Just kidding.

There are more, but I think those are the things that I require the most before I agree to be in a relationship with him. Bottom line is this is what I want, I man not speaking in behalf of the XX population. Everybody is different, and I guess the surefire way to find out what women look for in a man is know her interests and activities, spend time with her, know her an the people around her...or better yet, just ask her.

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