by Elaine Arthur

Created on: July 02, 2007

If you're reading this article, you own a business, and there's money out there that isn't being paid to you.

Much of the collections process involves dealing with people and their funny little quirks. In a perfect world, we would remind a customer that s/he owes us money, and get a polite, agreeable reply, followed by a speedy payment. If that were the norm, there wouldn't be such a topic as "collections."

There are a lot of responses you can expect when you make a collections call, but they fall into general categories. Here are some of them:

Genuine surprise. The bill was overlooked, or there was a shakeup of some kind at the company and bills just didn't get paid. If there are no other issues, you can probably expect a timely payment. But take good notes anyway and be sure to follow up if payment doesn't come.

Fake surprise. The customer knows perfectly well that they didn't pay you, but they don't want to look like deadbeats, either to you or to themselves. When you get fake surprise, what happens afterward will make all the difference. If you keep up the pressure as outlined earlier (take notes, repeat what they promised, follow up frequently, etc.), they are likely to pay the bill if they can, because after the first call, they can't pretend not to know about the bill any more. Their only recourse (a pathetic one at that) is to put a different person on the phone every time you call, so they can keep pretending they know nothing about the bill. If this is what they resort to, let the little game play out. Just keep taking notes, making calls, following up, and after awhile, you will be fully justified in turning it over to a collection agency or a lawyer.

The pity party. You will hear a litany of hard-luck stories, even from larger companies. The boss has been in the hospital for weeks now with heart failure and he's not allowed to sign checks. The office was flooded; the records are in Des Moines and the checkbook is in Dubuque. Their best client got carried off by a twister and things just haven't been the same since they can barely make ends meet.

The defensive offense. This involves someone reacting to your request for payment with anger, outrage or righteous indignation. This can be scary. We live in violent, litigious times, and it's normal to worry if you got on some sicko's last nerve.

Stalling tactics. This one is hugely popular. It will waste your time, wear you out, and make you want to shake the other party. With this approach, the individual

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