by Hande Saglam

Created on: June 30, 2007

RAMBLINGS OF THE INSIDER

The concrete and glass heaven surrounding a breath of fresh air, the sliding doors of the grand galleries, the three trees standing up alone, rooting together under the shadow of thick blue blankets. The silver balls with their parents and siblings. The street lamps' tall sky high brightness and their breath taking invincibility. The construction sites and road works, the closed junctions and crowded lanes. The rhetoric questions of how and when. The cream umbrellas on hotel patios, the suitcases full of clothes and cosmetics. Tourists glancing at the differences and the similarities of their hometowns. The manic depression of the pavement, the hot the cold the wet the dry grass.

The children of Moses, of Christ and of Mohammed. Their unbearable souls and sparks. The dirt under my shoes and the chewing gum on the benches, the Juliet windows and balconies. The steps high and low, fast and slow. The intrigue, the love, the hate, the dove with one claw, the crow with a single crooked wing. The lady with the pinkie missing and eyes too dark, the invest in me mentality. The cleavage, the eroticism, the naked legs, the bronze skin. The mermaid hair, the clown faces of todays' and yesterdays' world. The shimmering, the sand, those lost and found offices of the train stations and airports. The caviar, the champagne and the poverty in hearts. The endless running water, the children playing and the police roaming. The oceans, the continents, the universe, the totality of human essence and barbaric behaviour in 21st century.

The books, the paintings alive, the inevitable power of muscles. The music and the dance and all the drunk board games of politicians. The excitement found in speed boats and motorbikes, the smoking ban and drug abuse, the cirrhosis eaten livers and the magic of tequila. The posters, the ripped thoughts of lunatics, the justification of right and the pitch black darkness of wrong. The million decisions I make on any day and their begging for longing. The friends and family...The abusive and unappreciative behaviour of peace. The mortal idea of love. The weddings, the funerals, the idea of a better end. The homeless and the shame, the embarrassment. The orchids and the lilies. The words, the essays, the poems, the sonnets...The drain pipes, the faeces, the urine, the rats. The underground and its gross mystery. The hay fever, the malaria, the unforgiving bacteria. The way things seem and the way things are. The pity and Picasso's

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