by Linda Ann Nickerson

Created on: June 29, 2007   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

GLORIA'S GARDENER

Gloria lived next door, but she never came out of her house, and no one ever rang her bell. Truth be told, we were terrified of Gloria. Once, she may have shrieked at Bobby Billinger. Another time, she may have swerved towards Sukie Jameson on her tricycle. The stories grew from there.

Plain and simple, Gloria hated children and dogs. Especially dogs.

When we went trick-or-treating, we skipped Gloria's house, certain that she would put razors in her apples, cyanide in her chocolates, or hemlock in her popcorn balls. Perhaps she would not answer the door at all.

Gloria had a gardener named Albert. This elderly gentleman faithfully manicured her lawn and gardens. As we played in our yard, we would often peek through the bordering shrubs and watch him hunch over her pachysandra and pluck weeds from her plantings.

We would dare each other to sneak up behind old Albert and snap his suspenders, but no one ever did.

As kids, we romped all over the neighborhood, in and out of every yard. Every yard except Gloria's.

We would run and jump and tumble with Pooka-Pup, our family dog of unknown heritage. Occasionally, the ball would fall in Gloria's yard, and we would play "Rock-Paper-Scissors" to determine who had to muster up the courage to fetch it. Even the dog seemed afraid to cross the border.

One autumn weekend, as I helped my dad to rake leaves in our yard, we discovered a surprise. My father lifted some branches in the bushes between our property and Gloria's. Nestled in the fallen leaves, we found something shiny.

"What is this?" Dad asked.

He bent and pickup up a zippered plastic bag, filled with dog droppings. Puzzled, we continued raking and unearthed more than a dozen bags, all filled with dog doo.

Albert had neatly packaged it up and launched it into our yard. Perhaps Pooka-Pup was braver than we thought! When had she crossed the border?

From that day on, we kept a much closer eye on Pooka-Pup. She never entered Gloria's domain again. Who would dare?

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