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SAHM and Working Moms. Why is this a debate at all? This is a decision made within the family not the community. This is not a way a life that should be debated but respected. Have we become such a society that everybody has to have an opinion on everybody else's life and no one takes action to actually help. I am so tired of all this bickering about who is right and who is wrong. Why not come together as a community to help each other instead of berate each other. Find solutions that work instead if spew our opinion on what is a better choice. This is a fact is this is not a debatable subject. The choices are usually made for us and until there is a drastic change in government or in finance this is life. Some stay at home others work.

The only person who suffers is the child not because one way of parenting is "better" but because there is need to have one way better then the other. Both sides have its ups and downs. Sure, it would be great to be a stay at home mom, it's all I ever wanted to do, but it is not practical. Cost of quality daycare is through the roof but my husband and I manage with the help of family. There is no possible way would be able to live a comfortable life with out us both working and I do not see our son suffering for this anymore then his counter parts who have stay at home moms. If I were able to I would stay at home, but that would be a choice I would make because it is what I would want to do not what is expected of me or what society dictates.

I believe that if as much time was spent on debating this issue as there was time spent focusing on helping those who want to stay at home and can't or helping moms who want to work but also want to be more flexible for their families we would have a better society over all.

Imagine a world where a stay at home mom looked after the children of a woman who wants to work and the woman who works was able to provide health insurance for the SAHM. That would be a fair trade. Talk about the community coming together as a posed to separating itself on trivial ideals that are just not realistic in today's world. Companies were more flexible with scheduling to allow part time work with same benefits or work at home options. Parents coming together to form co-opt daycare and after school programs. The possibilities are endless.

The real debate should be: How can we better support those who stay at home and those who go to work outside the home?

Learn more about this author, Mary Nerad.
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