11 of 54

Write now Article Tools

I adore my friends, as it should be! On the same note, however, I expect a lot from my friendships. Maybe it is because I have had so little family that I could rely on over the years. A lot has been taken from me. I know that is not their problem and do not put this burden on them. Here's some thoughts on realistic expectations for a great friendship!

Friendships through Christ have taken on new meaning for me and are much deeper as we share a common bond in Christ. No amount of shopping, entertainment or dining will take the place of a prayer or church service shared together. It is a spiritual experience.

You can expect reliability from true friends. If they say they will be somewhere or pray for me then they do it. Emergencies do arise and allowances are made for those. If friends continually do not keep their commitments, or do not reciprocate, then it is safe to assume they won't keep their commitment to your friendship and move on amicably. Also if you sense someone is out to hurt you, end the friendship. Usually I just do not call and they take the hint. Again, this is very rare and hopefully won't happen too often.

Trust and respect are key. It seems I am very trustworthy and this is a trait I value highly. People, even if they are not friends, will come to me for help and confide in me. I keep their secrets and take them to the grave. It is no one else's business what another has experienced in their life. Trust that they will be there for you. Also, gossip has no place in friendship. Not to say I won't discuss things that are bothering me but it goes no further than that person. You will also treat that person with dignity and respect and never cause them harm deliberately.

I realize also I am not the perfect friend nor do I want to be. Acceptance and a rich measure of forgiveness is important. There are going to be conflicts and misunderstandings in all your relationships. You will put your foot in your mouth many times, unfortunately. Some people can appear moody or irritating or just plain misunderstood. They are not always the "sweet thing" you envisioned. Realize this about your friends and as long as they do not continually drain you, you will be headed for a long friendship that is "tried and true."

Love is very important and encompasses everything here. Friends need to feel valued, treasured and loved. This is a selfless type of love, one where you seek the good of the other person above your own. Always putting their needs and comfort ahead of your own. You enjoy being with them and confide in them. You share many experiences and secrets. You cannot give them enough of yourself, your time or even gifts to show them how you feel. Nothing is too good for them. They are the shining stars God placed in your life to help you along your path.

Ask yourself what you value. Look at the time and resources you have to give to another person then pray God will guide you. Also take a close look at your needs. If you already have good friends, then do what you can to enrich those friendships to make them even better.

May you experience treasured friendship in its richest form at least once in your lifetime!

Learn more about this author, I'm done.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

Add your voice

Know something about Essays: Friendship?
We want to hear your view. Write now!