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Of course! We lap up such thrilling stories. It reveals to the public how therapeutic our news media has become. The world is collapsing around our ears. People are plotting at this moment to wipe us off the face of the earth. What matters if there is constant war, disease, poverty, environmental disasters and genocide? Paris Hilton is a delightful distraction for dumbed-down Americans and a profit landslide for the media.

The media moguls are gleefully saying, let's not bore the public with all that nasty stuff. Let's follow the wonderful misadventures of the poor little rich girl. Our readers and viewers are only interested in her, because when she is good, she is very, very good; and when she is bad, our ratings go up and we make lots of money from advertising.

Therefore, we can look forward to more thrilling stories of Hollywood bimbos behind bars, sleep-around pro sports jocks, political thieves, rock stars in rehab and all the other happy news we really need. Who gives a rodent's gluteus maximus about what's happening in the rest of the world? Is America great, or what?

Learn more about this author, Ted Sherman.
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