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You know, when human beings first started pledging to stay together "until death do us part", death was only approximately twenty-five years away. The average life span in the middle ages was about thirty five or forty years. Suppose you wait until you are a fully functional female, say, oh, I don't know, about fourteen (I know, a pedophile's delight. But really, when you only have forty years, you have to start early) and then you get married. Twenty years together, with childbirth, and hard times, and disease, and every other tragedy we no longer consider part of normal life here in the good ole USA, surviving that is miraculous. Forty years of the same? Well it's no wonder people divorce at the rate that they do.

I am a feminist, and a woman, and I do believe that women coming to see themselves as equal to men has led to increased rates of divorce. After all, if a man can leave a lousy relationship, why not a woman? The thing that I believe we all miss when we look at the statistics is that of the couples who remain married, many, maybe as many as half, are staying for some other reason than that the relationship is just peachy keen, thank you! In reality, often one spouse is ill, or too religious, or ill-prepared for a life on their own. The thought of it is just too much. And that, my friends, is what they have in common with people who are divorcing.
How can I possible know this, you say? Simple. I have been a divorce attorney for fifteen years, and I know. The biggest fear of my clients, and I will say most clients in general, is that they cannot divide the one family pie into two pieces that are each the same size as the original pie. Guess what? They're right! So. What does a person in this situation do to resolve this? Many find a replacement piece (oops, I mean spouse) so that the pie is the same size again, or even (gasp) larger than it was before. Others find two big pieces of wood, tie them together and become martyrs to their cause, the "s/he did this to me and no I'm going to be miserable forever" cause. (For those of you out there reading this who may be looking for a replacement piece for your pie, stay away from those with the two pieces of wood. They have a full plate, and no room for your needs or wants, even if all you want is to make them feel better. Especially if they have children. Don't even get me started!)
Occasionally, though, a person will experience what I like to call the divorce epiphany, and realize

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