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'Coming out'

It sounds so simple, so straight forward. Whereas in reality that couldn't be further from the truth!

For a Homosexual (male or female) coming out of the closet will be an absolutely life changing experience.

And that isn't because it changes who you are, it's because it means you are finally able to confront yourSELF about who you are.

I remember coming out with mixed feelings of rage/loathing and sheer amusement. When I first had an idea that I was gay I was only 14 years old. For some that may be considered old, some have claimed to realize this before they hit their tenth birthday. But the fact remains that I was still a young boy, reliant on my parents, dependent on the care of others and still surrounded by hundreds of school children (nearly) everyday.

I was absolutely terrified with the prospect! When I first had the thought, I pushed it to the back of my mind, shrugging it off as 'just a phase' or an 'illness' that I might, someday grow out of. As I would soon realize, it wasn't a phase at all. It was something I would hide for four more years, constantly scared and paranoid that someday someone would discover my 'filthy' secret, one I swore to myself one tearful night that I would take to the grave.

Some of you will be reading this thinking 'bloody drama queen!' and others among you will know only too well what I'm talking about! For some reason, coming out is easier for some than it is for others, for me it was particularly hard, for my younger brother who is also gay, it was far easier.

Whichever it is for you, there are still many hurdles to overcome. Many stages to 'coming out':

*1 Coming out to yourself.

This is easily the first stage. That first idea that you may be different, that you are attracted to the same sex is a scary and daunting realization that we all must learn to live with. For some it will take years, for others it'll be a lot earlier. Some of my gay friends didn't come to terms with their feelings until two marriages and three children later!
This time can be an emotional roller coaster. One day you may feel on top of the world and ready to tell everyone and another day you are terrified of your secret being found out, feeling thankful that you hadn't said anything.

The bottom line is realizing that there is no cure, no remedy for your feelings and emotions. And why should there be? Being a homosexual is as much a defining quality as you're hobbies and interests. Many people will disagree with that statement. But I believe that

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