Next to the bride and groom, and the lovely bridesmaids, the handsomely attired groomsmen are major players in a wedding ceremony and reception. Being asked is a privilege and an honor.

Now that you have asked your bride to stand with you for life, whom will you ask to stand with you for the wedding?

FAMILIES

Family members often expect to be included automatically in your wedding party. Certainly, you are not obligated to select your brothers, uncles, cousins, and nephews as groomsmen. However, if you have a close family, you might think of ways these folks could participate.

Many grooms select a handful of groomsmen, who escort the bridesmaids down the aisle and stand up at the altar for the proceedings. In addition, they may choose a squad of ushers, who assist guests with seating. Groomsmen and ushers may all wear the wedding party attire. This way, even a large family may be included.

You can foster friendships between your family and your bride's family by selecting from among your relatives and hers for your wedding party. Does your beloved have a treasured brother or cousin? Why not include him?

FRIENDS

Traditionally, a groom may choose his closest friends to accompany him during his nuptuals. Of course, you will want to select individuals you admire and trust. Ponder these questions:

Which of your friends may concern you, as you consider what they may say during a wedding toast?

Which buddies give you pause, as you think about what they might plan or do during a pre-wedding bachelor party?

Which pals worry you, when you wonder how they might behave during your wedding reception?

FINANCES

Serving in a wedding party can be both an honor and a financial obligation. As you consider your friends, think about how to handle this. Perhaps you have a best buddy, and you would love to include him, but he may be unable to afford the travel expenses or the tuxedo rentals. Are you willing to foot the bill for him? (Does this mean you will bear expenses for all the men?)

HOW MANY GROOMSMEN DO YOU NEED?
Some couples choose to invite only the best man and maid of honor to stand with them as witnesses. Others engage entire armies of gowned girls and suited swains.

In most cases, couples try to match the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, so they can walk evenly together during the processional and recessional.

This is a matter of personal choice.

Learn more about this author, Linda Ann Nickerson.
Click here to send author comments or questions.

---

Add your voice

Know something about A guide to choosing your groomsmen?
We want to hear your view. Write now!