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The nature of the mother daughter relationship starts in infancy and develops into adulthood and is bound with cords of love that resound with the life long call of duty to honor a certain code of conduct that includes kissing boo boos and listening to every heart ache that comes along. This dyad moves along in childhood as the mother listens intently to all the little stories of the day and comforts her daughter as she confesses her dilemmas and even goes so far as to forgive the other children who made her child cry, knowing that they are only children themselves. But it is amazing how the nature of the relationship between the mother and the daughter changes when the eternal heart is at stake and the daughter comes home with tears about a boy who could someday be a son in law. Those tears that the mother sees in her daughter's eyes are not as easy to forgive somehow as the tears caused by the smaller children years ago. Why then does the daughter seem to forgive them with the same ease? When she comes to the mother looking for the same acceptance to these tears the conflict beings because the code of conduct that has existed since childhood has changed and mommy is not the same anymore.
Painted and picture perfect as the last paragraph is in places, it is making a point about a before and after relationship with the mother and daughter. Before sexual maturity and after. When a mother shows disdain for a mate or a future life choice because of a simple fight that the daughter had it can become frustrating. This happens because the daughter gets over the incident quickly because of her level of commitment to the boy, but the mother sees him as a potential life time threat to her daughter. If he could hurt her once he could do it again. The daughter shared her feelings with her mom expecting her to forgive and forget like she always had in the past and still believing in the code of kissing boo boos and always listening and forgiving she is surprised and hurt by her mother's intolerance.
Suddenly the mommy is much more powerful emotionally and has more control then before and conflict begins because the proverbial apron strings begin to pull. She starts using a super power of influence that never surfaced in this way before and the daughter has to choose how to respond. When the daughter reaches her sexual maturity and is ready to choose a life time mate, what they both don't realize is that the rules between them changed because the stakes
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The complexities of the mother-daughter relationship
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