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- You have already accepted the fact that receiving social security waved bye-bye to you long ago.

- You keep your cell phone in your pocket, rather than attached to a clip on the outside of your belt.

- You realize that having enough kids to field a soccer team may be a little excessive.

- You have never walk to school uphill both ways in the snow... without shoes... In fact, you have never walked to school; it's way too dangerous.

- You are positive that a blog has nothing to do with a swamp.

- You can speak in text message language.

- You always considered being sent to your room a reward rather than punishment. At least your room had video games and television.

- You have ever smarted off to a teacher knowing that the teacher could not whack you.

- You have never seen a gas price lower than a dollar.

- You had no idea Nelly wasn't the first person to "Shake [his] Tail Feathers."

- You have ever had the privilege of blaming your academic shortcomings on ADD.

- If you have never thought wearing your paints even with your navel as socially acceptable.

- If you are aware that "emo" is not a character on Sesame Street.

- The word "draft" makes you think of beer instead of war.

Learn more about this author, Drew Price.
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