by Kathy Williams

Created on: May 25, 2007

Helping Your Child Become Independent

It's a bold and challenging world. It can seem too big when parents worry about their children's place in it. Is the child prepared to face it? How will the child cope with the many ups and downs, temptations, pitfalls? It's enough to tie the apron strings in a knot. But you can't. Whether you want to face it or not, one day your child will be flying solo in a great big world. As parents, you can prepare your child for the inevitable. You can teach your child responsibility, you can instill in your child a strong character, and you can nurture your child's self esteem.

It is best to start as early as possible in teaching your child responsibility. It is best to note that children learn from watching us. The best way we can teach a child is to be a good example. Be a responsible adult. A lot of responsibility has to do with making choices and living with the consequences of those choices.
You can let children make choices that will affect their day to day lives. As you see your child making good choices with not so important tasks, you can gradually increase the level of important choices they can make. It is good to get in the habit of letting your child make choices.

A strong character is very important for a child to have. Instilling your sense of honesty, integrity, fairness, and exhibiting self-discipline will prepare your child for many things that life has to offer. A strong character will also make your child a good citizen, someone you can be proud of. But it all starts with you. You have to pave the way for your child's progression into the world, and then let him go.

Your child's self esteem is the heart of how your child will interact with the world. If your child is always down on himself and has a lack of confidence, he has low self esteem. You can help him by encouraging him and praising him often. You can provide your child with a secure home life. You can work out problems without arguing and yelling. You can offer constructive feedback to his failures and celebrate with him when he succeeds. You can encourage him to try. The more he succeeds, the more confident he will become and the more successes he will have. You can make him feel really loved.

Letting go of your child may not be an easy thought, but it's going to happen. Preparing your child with the tools he will need to cope with life on his own will give you peace of mind and it will make you proud that you did a good job. Being on your child's "team" as he tries out his wings will mean a lot to him and he will thank you in the way he lives his life.

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