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Humor: Confusion

by Michael Stone

Created on: May 23, 2007

I have IMS.

Don't fret.

I'm hoping to be able to cope with Intermittent Memory Syndrome. Yes, it's that ghastly condition whereby a seemly normal, healthy individual, inexplicably can't remember something said only a week, a day even an hour before, if not just minutes prior.

I would have told you about this sooner, but I forgot to divulge the condition.

It came to light during a recent lunch conversation, just yesterday (or was it the day before. ) Anyway, I had to ask today "what was the name of that syndrome?".

Why?

Yep, you got it, I forgot.

Now, I don't want anyone to get this confused with YDS, or the more common, Yes Dear Syndrome. The ailment whereby a spouse seems to paying attention to the details of your conversation, when it fact they're reciting baseball statistics or supermodel measurements to themselves within the confines of their puny cranial cavities that house that pitiful excuse for gray matter.

Oh sure it's mainly a male affliction, but I have been "wifed" more than once in my time. But I digress.

Back to Intermittent Memory Syndrome. If you, like I, find this to be creeping into your life ever increasingly, I suggest you just go with it.

Don't try to fight it.

As they say on Star Trek "Resistance is futile." or is that Star Wars?

Oh well you get the gist of my thinking. I find this of increasing concern, especially with my increased performance of my original music. I've actually forgotten lyrics and chords to songs I've been performing for years. I have many tell me not to worry about it when I get frustrated with this situation, by telling me, "Don't worry no one knows the songs anyway".

Thanks!? I think.

Many of my "friends" in fact say that I should just use another of my recent ailments as cover. But I don't want to have to depend on MMS, Momentary Mumbling Syndrome, when it comes to my music. No! I want everyone to get the full effects of my prose and musical subtlety. I refuse to fall into the trap of depending on medical infirmities to explain away the problems.

That being said, I've decided to start weekly meetings for those with IMS/YDS/MMS. We might as well combine the support groups so we can all benefit at once.

Now if we can just remember where the meetings are to be held.

Learn more about this author, Michael Stone.
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