by Michael Stone

Created on: May 23, 2007   Last Updated: May 25, 2007

Performers: Finding the inner peace.

A recent survey confirms public speaking is still our number one fear.By the way computers came in number two.

If public speaking is number one, public performance can't be far down on the list. For anyone who's ever been in the 8th grade talent show, you know the jitters that can precede and virtually overwhelm that moment in the public eye. Even to the point that you can't recall one brief moment from your stint under the spotlights harsh glare.

Radio performers (not DJ's please) as well as musicians face this type of angst almost daily. How we deal with it is another subject all together.

Admit it or not. Like it or not. Performers do it for the "approval" of others. I can't tell you how many times I've heard someone say; "I do it because I love it".

99.9% of the time, I'm not buying it. Why? Because, I've been there.

No matter how much we try to distance ourselves as performers from the reality of reviews or an apathetic audience it is inevitable that we'll have an inner anxiety gremlin gnawing at our self esteem, laying bare insecurities.

This plays itself out in my psyche on the radio everyday as a personality. It's inevitable to wonder of the unseen and seldom encountered audience; "Do they like me"?

Of course, ratings tell the tale in many cases, but "numbers" seem so cold, and does that mean you're not really good at what you do? I hope not.

It's the same when I take my singer-songwriter act to a stage. Sometimes the audience seems enraptured by the performance, other times you're just the background sound-scape to their daily grind.

How can one NOT be driven crazy with insecurity?

I believe I found the answer after reading an article from the Washington Post.

They decided to do an experiment. Here's the basic premise.

Take Joshua Bell,one of the world's greatest violinists. His instrument of choice is a multi-million-dollar Stradivarius. If he played it for spare change, incognito, outside a bustling Metro stop in Washington, would anyone notice?

As you might imagine, his performance,as beautiful as I'm sure it was,went largely unnoticed by those on the run to here or there. Normally they'd pay $100 plus a seat for his show.

Some might be discouraged by this experiment.

Me? I came away with a different slant on this undertaking.

I came away a new understanding that I really did need to do this, performing, for myself. I really did need to find and suppress those insecurity flaws and perform simply for the joy and love of performing.

Guess what? It worked. I've become a more settled, less neurotic performer. Oh sure there are moments when little voices start screaming in my head, but for now. I'm at peace with the stage, the audience and my self.

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