The issues to remember when speaking to a teacher about homework problems are mostly the same issues as in any parent-teacher dialogue. I should point out that these tips only allow the parents to optimize the chances of success; ultimately, if the teacher is truly adamant, no amount of persuasion will do, and parents might be forced to turn to the principal or other superior.

First and foremost, as in every such dialogue, it is wrong to approach the teacher as an adversary. Parents who are confrontational and aggressive will cause the teacher to pay less attention to whatever grievances the parents have and will instead become defensive and perhaps just as hostile. The key to the dialogue is to address the teacher as a partner, an ally in the attempt to make the school experience for the child as good as it can be. The child might try to portray the homework as needless, harmful and even sadistic, but the parent must be aware that homework has many positive values and that the child's idea of eradicating it completely is not constructive. There is no reason to criticize the teacher personally; rather, the parent should explain why the homework assignments are difficult for the child to complete, and that either a one time change or a general policy switch are in order. Very often the teacher will be fine with this alone, and sometimes will explain that they were unaware that there was a problem and that they would be glad to change.

Second, it is generally useful to mention the condition of the student and the background from which he or she comes. This may help the teacher appreciate the effect that the homework is having on the student's life outside school. In elementary school, parents should emphasize that this is not a stage in which intensive studying is appropriate, and that the child shouldn't be prevented from enjoyable and creative activities just because he or she has to complete a homework assignment. In high school, the students likely have other activities, and if the problem is that homework is interfering with these activities it should be explained to the teacher. Of course, if the problem is a medical or psychological one with the student, this should be simply detailed to the teacher, and in these cases I do not think there should be any difficulty in changing the homework plan.

Lastly, it is useful to create some direct dialogue between the students and the teacher. The students should feel comfortable to go straight to the teacher rather than turning to the parent, who then speaks with the teacher. The indirect approach is inconvenient to all three parties; the parent must invest time and energy into getting involved in the matter, the teacher must set time aside to meet the parent, and the child might not convey the message well through the parents. Thus, students should be encouraged to turn first to their teacher regarding their grievances, and only complain to their parents if absolutely necessary. Additionally, in addition to reporting to the parents, the teacher should either accept or reject the complaint in front of the class, including the reasoning behind it. This will prevent misunderstandings and will also allow the students to reply by themselves. This has the additional advantage of giving the students some independance from their parents, which can play an important role in their development.

In summary, the most important idea to remember is that the teacher should be spoken to without hostility, as a friend and cooperator rather than as an adversary. That is the key to any dialogue, and in this case applies particularly well.

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