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My grandmother used to say "If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all." Boy, was she right! I have learned that nothing good ever seems to come from being negative (or at least expressing that negativity out loud). It isn't that we need to be blindly ignorant, or even seem so. Constructive discussion has often solved many an issue. I believe there are three tests to apply to anything has entered the brain, but not yet been uttered...

1. If I say this, will it hurt someone's feelings? (Mrs. Smith MAY have the biggest butt in the world , but she probably does not need someone to make this observation!)

2. If I say this, what could some of the consequences be? (A negative word to your boss, could bring attention to a problem at work, or it could get you a place in the unemployment line!)

3. If the "shoe were on the other foot" , would I want someone saying this to me? If your husband really is cheating with the tramp next door, should the gardener tell you?

You really do "catch more flies with honey" than you do vinegar, so feel free to stand up for your rights calmly if need be, express yourself freely in the spirit of the first amendment, but think before you talk!

Learn more about this author, Elise Warren.
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