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How to let go of someone you love

Maybe thinking gets in the way of what is natural sometimes but since we are human animals we have to deal with that aspect of ourselves and try to use our thinking capacity in a way that benefits us all.

You might love your spouse, your grown-up child, your parent and they might be indulging in an activity that is not good for them such as alcohol and drug addiction. What do you do? Enable the bad behavior thus contributing to it. You must let go. And enabling this behavior and putting up with it is not good for you either.

So how do you do this if they are indulging in this very bad behavior. Sometimes you might have to be a little harsh, but they need to grow up and recognize their bad behavior and come to terms with it. You didn't stop loving your loved person. You are actually helping them by letting them go. They have to find their own way. You won't be able to do it for them.
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Some grown-up children indulge in all sorts of tricks to get you to keep enabling them, such as being the victim. They cry and cry and tell you about their horrible victimization, but what they are really doing is manipulating and controlling you for their own purposes. The person who plays the victim has a lot of power over those he plays this game with - usually totally unsuspecting people like their parents.

To find your own way, you might have to leave this person go. Trying to solve this person's problems is a drain on your own life and energy. We all have the right to live and not be manipulated and controlled by other people, which might include the ones, we love the most. This makes the hard part. We love them so much we want to indulge their every whims no matter what.

Maybe your situation requires that you do not let this person go. You don't always have to let a loved one go to solve the situation.

Maybe it is your aging parent. Do you put the parent in a nursing home or care for him in your home? What do you do? It depends on you and the kind of time you have to devote to this person. I think a good idea is the grandparent house - a little house next to your house. And there are many alternatives to nursing home care, such as in-home care, that are much less expensive than the nursing home. So you don't have to let go of a loved one.

Sometimes with a spouse it can be very difficult. You love your husband but he has just molested your child. What do you do? In this case probably divorce is the best. You have to understand that your spouse no matter how much you love him


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