My inner strength only seemed visible during times of difficulty. I always considered myself someone who played it "safe". I didn't try out for anything in high school until my senior year because I was to afraid of the rejection. I knew that my senior year was the last shot I had to do something in High School, so with my back against the wall, I tried out for cheerleading, dance team and the boys varsity soccer team (we didn't have a girls team.) To my surprise, I made all three and even started at midfielder on the soccer team. Now, you think that would have boosted my confidence, but it didn't. I continued on in life just trying to not fail. Which only seemed to bring it on more.
I got pregnant and married at 21, which began a series of disappointments. We were married for 10 years but never together longer than 6 months at a time, (6 months on, 6 months off.) During this miserable time of trying to provide for my children, in between the tears, broken heart and financial burdens, a funny thing happened, I found that I can accomplish anything. We never were homeless, I always found a way to scrape by and I stopped letting my ex-husband manipulate me.
Imagine my amazement, struggle and pain produce inner strength. Wow, what a concept!
It happened time and time again, even now, as I try to find my life purpose, my unhappiness with my present employment situation has driven me back to my greatest passion, writing. I found that I still have something to say and it gives me joy. The pain of life is for your own personal growth, it pushes you out of your comfort zone and into that dark and cold place called the unknown! A place where all your dreams can come true.
Learn more about this author, Lisa Petrarca.
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