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After we don our cap and gown, many of us find that we are glad to leave high school behind. Though we bask in sweet memories of adventurous times with friends, first kisses, and proms, once we settle into a more stable life after high school many are reluctant to even entertain the thought of having to return. The memories sustain us. Many of us would choose not to go back to the rumors, to the heartbreaks, to the harsh judgment of our peers. Leaving high school behind is liberating. We no longer fear that we will be crucified for our wardrobe. We will no longer be the center of juicy gossip. We will no longer be pressured into things beyond our age. We will still have our friends and our fun nights out, without all the locker-room drama.

Then came Myspace.com.

I'll admit, the first time I saw my brother poring over the pages of Myspace I was intrigued. Who'd have thought that Jane had a baby after graduation? Who knew Tommy and Lisa would get married? Who knew Bob would gain so much weight? All of the answers that I thought I'd have to wait until my class reunion to get came before me, in the comfort of my own home. I could read my classmates' blog's, I could view their personal photos. I could be in the know. Suddenly, I became a high-school girl all over again. I spent (and still sometimes do) hours researching everyone I've ever known. Because, after all, everyone ANYONE has ever known is on Myspace. Who'd have thought?

So yes, I caved to the imaginary peer pressure and put up a page of my own. Suddenly, I was making and receiving friend requests. Suddenly though, my photos weren't good enough. My biography wasn't good enough. I wanted to show people of the past that I was doing well. Very well. Perhaps even better than I really am. I wanted to show that even years after graduation, I still "had" it. Suddenly, my self-esteem plummeted and my camera accompanied me on all outings. I needed to show the world that I didn't get old. I'm still cool. Not too surprisingly, I noticed, many other people were doing the same. The crazy photos, the impossible biographies.

So now I'm a few months deep. What have I found? Well, first of all there is no doubt that "Myspacing" is addicting. My mother, brother, sister and husband have made pages of their own. Late nights are spent scouring the site for who's doing what, who's doing who, who is where, etc. But how much am I really learning? Only what others want me to see.

Maybe we all secretly loved the drama of high school. I mean, here we are, grown adults with families and full-time jobs. We can barely find the time to fit in a good meal yet we find time to read about Jacob from freshman year-who, by theeee way, dropped out of college and is now playng the drums in a garage band in California.

Maybe the pressures that we faced are what made us strive for better. For more.
Maybe we all secretly love Myspace so much because it'll get us out of our class reunion. Or maybe we never grow out of loving "knowing the dirt." It works both ways, while you peer at Susie Q's profile and comment on how you never pictured her getting a perm take a look at your own profile....
Because somewhere out there, someone is looking you up. And they might just be wondering where on Earth you got the idea to post a photo of yourself wearing hot-pink jeans...

Learn more about this author, Amy Lynne.
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