by Akramah

Created on: April 29, 2007   Last Updated: September 11, 2010

Marriage is a very joyous and beautiful occasion. That is why divorce is a very tragic event. It affects all involved and, if there are children, the effect on them could be damaging.

There are many causes for divorce. The causes vary because people and circumstances differ. The most common cause, however, is communication or the lack thereof. Many people, after marriage, become so comfortable with their partners that they become less careful in their choice of words. They inadvertently call their spouses names or suggest that their spouses are the weaker link in the union. It is not right under any circumstance, for example, for a spouse to tell the other one continually that his or her reasoning is like that of a child. Absurd as it sounds, such unintended insults occur daily in marriages all over the world and they lead to divorce.

Secondly, spouses often assume that the other one 'understands' certain situations so explanations are not necessary. Such a lack of explanations could create mistrust that could fester into divorce. Indeed, taking a partner for granted comes in many forms. It is very easy for some to forget that they need to even say 'thank you' for little, little extra benefits they get from their spouses. Everything takes effort so it's necessary to let your spouse know that you appreciate every little favor you get from him or her. In much the same way, saying 'sorry' for the minutest infraction goes a long way to keep a marriage together.

Another common factor in divorce is the uncompromising attitude of some spouses. No matter how wise you are, some of your positions may be erroneous. Even if you are convinced that you are right, it helps to meet your partner half way by trying to change a trait that he or she finds abhorrent or by simply shutting up when an argument seems to be heading in the direction of a quarrel.

Talking about arguments leads to another very important issue in the subject of divorce; money or the need for it. I remember my dad calling all of us, his children, together and telling us that we should never argue over money, food or chores. Money is at the root of most arguments that arise in marriages. The bad thing about arguments over money is that they often leave mistrust and humiliation in their wake. When that happens, one or both parties may want out of the marriage.

Furthermore, external forces also contribute in no small measure to divorce. Friends and family members sometimes interfere in marriages often by giving

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