48 of 120

Write now Article Tools

Page 2 of 2

paired up and reproducing! After that, we're on our own, "for better or worse".

Couples who have bought into the idea that the heady "in love" feeling can last forever and a day are genuinely surprised and dismayed when things inevitably cool off; they may interpret the "crash" that naturally follows a "high" as reason to call it quits. Back down to earth, and the eyes are opened to the realization that the person they married probably hasn't changed any of those habits and behaviors that were dismissed early on.

CONNECTION OVER COMPATIBILITY?

You could say that too many people place "Connection" (that dizzying "in love" feeling) over "Compatibility" when it comes to relationships, and ultimately marriage. Of course, you must be in love with your partner, but you also must love who he or she really IS, as well. People rarely (if ever) change who they are at their core; we have to be realistic about understanding that when we marry someone, we also marry their personality, habits, behaviors, background, and issues.

We need to ask ourselves, "If this person (habit, behavior, issue) never changes from the way it is right now, will I still love him/her?" A tough- and possibly painful- question, but one that might save a lot of people from a painful divorce.

Learn more about this author, Christine Conte.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

• << previous page
• 1
• 2

Add your voice

Know something about The most frequent cause of divorce?
We want to hear your view. Write now!