It's a sad fact but true. You can't rely on changing someone else's behavior, you can only change your own reactions. By bulldozing, I imagine we're talking about family members who are pushy, domineering, like having their own way and rarely ask what you need or want to do. Is that right? If it is, some things you can do are:

1. Ask yourself what you fear they'll do if you resist.

If they're violent or vindictive, you may want to keep your distance and only offer what you don't mind giving up. If it's more subtle such as going into a huff for a while, aim to build enough confidence to withstand these reactions.

2. Get your oar in first
Don't give the ball over to them by asking their opinions, what they'd like or what they want to do. Tell them yours first. Let them know your plans as soon as you arrive. Conduct potentially tricky discussions on the phone.

3. Don't rise to challenges
Resist the urge to respond to challenging questions or go on the defensive. Smile and shrug. Wind up the conversation quickly with a vague response like "I'll think about it" then come up with a new subject.

4. Change scene and activity when possible
Arrange to meet somewhere rather than stay in the house. Bring or suggest some shared activity, like photo albums or videos rather than just sitting around talking. Use other forms of communication such as e-mails, funny post cards etc. to stay in touch without the need for so many face-to-face meetings.

5. Take the conversational lead
If they tend to harangue you, get them talking about themselves. Find out what books they're reading or tv shows they're watching. Ask older relatives about their youth or childhoods. Talk about something you read in the paper. Keep the topic of conversation well away from any areas where you feel vulnerable.

6. Pause and return
If people are quite reactive, wait and come back to challenge or disagree with them after a bit of a pause rather than straight away. It also gives you a chance to gather your thoughts. Return with something like "I've thought about what you were syaing and I actually don't agree".

7. Choose your battles
If somebody is always critical, argumentative or bossy, they sometimes switch their negativity onto so many different topics that they don't always remember what they were on about from one time to the next. If this is the case, you don't need to fight every battle, just the ones that keep coming up or have real consequences for you.

8. Draw attention to patterns, not personalities
If the same subjects keep cropping up time after time, try something like: "We've been here before. You always say..... and then I say...... I think we've reached the stage where we need to agree to disagree."

Learn more about this author, Adele Gregory.
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