How To Get A Greyhound Bus Double Seat All To Yourself.

Well, good for you! You've decided to leave the driving to Greyhound, and help save the planet. You'll be able to read or sleep, and arrive at your destination well rested and ready for anything.

But wait! Have you forgotten that unless you take steps to avoid it, you'll be sitting within an inch of one of your fellow passengers? Are you really ready to spend 10 hours in such close proximity to any stranger? Certainly, you may luck out and be
beside your soulmate.But you're also at risk of hurtling down the highway chatting with Dame Edna, Simon Cowell or Bart Simpson! Fear not! I have developed a checklist which,if used properly, will assure you of having an empty seat beside you. See what
you think:-

1. Look Odd.
Young people, wear very formal attire. Look as though you're unaware that teenagers these days dress in baggy, faded, ripped clothing and have piercings and tattoos everywhere.
Older people, make one change to your appearance. Men, wear a kilt. Women, try a tiara.This simple change in your appearance will cause others to do a double take and think, " Hope I don't get stuck next to THAT one."

2. Carry A Book.
You may have to make a dust jacket to fit over whatever book you want to read. Use big letters, so everyone can read the title. Here are a few suggested titles for your dust jacket:-"Living with Leprosy." "Lice Infestation. A sufferer's guide" " Everyone is a Potential Recruit. A Cult Leader's Handbook." " Flatulence.Don't Keep it Bottled Up" You get the idea.

3. This one never fails. My daughter, a veteran of many 23 hour bus trips, claims that this is a fail -me -never strategy:- Tuna juice in your shoes! It doesn't take long for the aroma to start wafting.

I hope you find this helpful and informative. But be careful! Don't be too offputing or YOU may get put off. Put off the bus, that is.

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