Assertiveness is expressing your feelings and asserting your rights while respecting the feelings and rights of others. It is appropriately direct, open and honest, and clarifies your needs to others. A major benefit of assertiveness is being able to reduce interpersonal conflict in your life, which is a primary source of stress.

Assertiveness is often confused with aggressiveness since both involve standing up for your rights and expressing your needs. Being assertive means you assume the best about people, show respect, and compromise when necessary. Aggressive individuals, however, are disrespectful, manipulative or abusive. They win at the expense of others and create unnecessary conflict.

Overall benefits of assertiveness are: fewer conflicts, less stress, getting your needs met, helping others get their needs met, and stronger relationships.

To experience the benefits of assertiveness:
- Stand up straight and look people in the eye.
- Use a firm, pleasant tone.
- Don't assume others' motives.
- Listen and ask questions to understand another's point of view.
- Think win-win to get needs met.

Learn more about this author, Michelle Gardner.
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