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I don't know about honesty being the best policy, but it would certainly be a general rule of thumb, though not necessarily the golden rule.

The reality though is that honesty can sometimes be very taxing. Sometimes we find it better to deviate a little from the truth. These are the proverbial little white lies no real harm done (or is there?). Then there are the lie to save your life' variety, where the truth can be detrimental to someone, something, or even society.

The thing is that it is not required for anyone to be totally honest to live through life. You get by, even get away, from lying every now and then. Sometimes, it is even expected for you to lie. The question therefore, is where to draw the line between truth and falsehood.

Actually, a better question is how do you justify a lie?' It is needless to say that telling too many lies will make you untrustworthy to others. It also makes you distrust others. If you can lie with such ease, who's to say others cannot? Then also, the more you lie, the more you get into the habit. Before long, you find yourself lying even more to cover your past lies, until finally there's no turning back. No one likes to live in a world of lies. Even if they are the little white lies, just a tonne of which would probably crush you.

So how do you justify or negate a lie? Well there is only one true way really, and that is to apologise, make recompense for your original lie. Sounds silly right? Are you really suppose to come clean and admit that you lied? Not necessarily. What I mean is that you need to accept that it is wrong and should not be always repeated. If you lied to someone close to you, then you should if possible admit to it. It may just be a white lie, in which case you should explain to the person why you sometimes need to do so. It is important to be open to those you want to love and trust.

Lying really isn't a good thing if you don't know to take responsibility for it. I think of it as something akin to cleaning your room. There are two ways to go about doing it. You can try cleaning it every time there's a little bit of trash, or when you put things out of place. Of course, this is the best thing to do, but it can be very inefficient, especially if you're in a hurry. Another way is to designate a time for you to do the cleaning, say every night. If you decide not to clean at all, your room will undoubtedly get very messy and uncomfortable to live in.

Taking responsibility for your lies is like knowing when it is time to clean up your room. Eventually you have to do it. Eventually you have to say sorry. Eventually you'll have to explain yourself.

It is always better sooner than later.

Learn more about this author, Harry Lamer.
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