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his brother as a "double" to aid my escape. Some ideas were absolutely brilliant, yet the majority were not well thought out. After much consideration, I decided which plan was most plausible. I decided to would go with the plan of dressing as a guard and making my way out the front gate. Once there, I would meet with a courier who would take me to meet my army. From there I would launch the attack and recover my stolen crown! It was a great plan, honed to the most minute detail.

The day I was to put my plan into action, everything seemed to go wrong: the uniform was the wrong color, the weapon was not functional, and the guards schedule was changed. "Drat!" I thought, "my plan is foiled!" Just as I was about to give up, they walked in. They were loyal servants, Master William and Mistress Billie. Yet, they didn't seem to recognize me. Despite my attempts at gaining their recognition: I spoke with them, stroked their collective ego for awhile, hoping they would realize who I was to no avail. I listened as they conversed with the guard: the guard, to my amazement, had no idea who I was! In fact, he referred to me as Fred. They went back and forth for a short period of time and then left the yard. I couldn't believe this, the guard actually mistook me for a commoner! Worse yet, Master William and Mistress Billie didn't recognize me!

To my astonishment, they returned and the guard informed me that my bail had been paid, I was free! I followed William and Billie to the front desk where they signed paperwork for my release. I noted, again, that my name was listed as "Fred", not "Czar Frederic Von Poundage", but "Fred". Heck, I was more than happy to allow the mistaken identity if it would get me free.

I left with William and Billie that day. I have not been back to my former castle and kingdom, I have established a new kingdom at my present home on Scipio Road. I will probably never return to my former kingdom, I'm enjoying my new kingdom far more than I could have ever imagined. I am royalty here: I sleep on a bed fit for a king, I have my own dinnerware, and many other amenities.

I dare say I've indulged in this story, but would you have read a story about me being caught in a cage then placed in a shelter and being adopted by a family?

My name is Czar Frederic Von Poundage most recently of Scipio, and that is my story.

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