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I recently officially became a godparent to a beautiful infant during a lovely family ceremony at a church.

My borderline pagan ways were revealed whilst later whetting the baby's head in the post-social gathering, I asked the minister when they changed the Lord's prayer (from thine' to you'). OK, it happened over a decade ago... and I am NOT a regular church goer! So it is no small thing I have had to personally evaluate what it means to me to be a godparent and how I can be this in the best interests of the child and his family.

My first interpretation is to have a special relationship with that child, and an especial interest in who they grow into as people, to ensure communication channels are open and they know they have an adult confidante and mentor. I believe being a godparent means you have a special role to model and maintain certain values, such as honesty, integrity and maybe guidance towards belief in a higher power (God, etc in alignment with parent's values.)

I think this role can also be considered by all people close to the child, such as aunts and uncles, grandparents and siblings or cousins where there is a large age gap.

The challenges to being able to do build and maintain a relationship of this type are actually quite varied, when you think about it deeply. What if distance is involved and you do not have the opportunity to see your godchild often? Maintaining contact, as age appropriate to the child, can be a challenge. Cards, phone calls, emails... the routes to communication are varied.

Relationships (and attitudes) can also change over time, and your closeness to the child's parents may change due to circumstances (they separate, move away as examples) or there is a personal development of conflict somehow. (Let's face it, sometimes friends do part over differences in views!) How you express your role as godparent is dependent, in part, on the parents and their wishes in regards to contact with the child; however it is not excusable to allow personal differences or a change in circumstances, to act as a wedge between you and your godchild.

The issue of gifts can be a dicey area. Are you expected to give gifts during all the traditional times (birthday, Christmas, etc)? Does the child have siblings and do you include these? How do you deal with not being in a situation you can maintain, on a material level, in a way to appease not only the child, but his individual position in the nucleus of a larger family? For example, if the other children

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