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The Intruder

The rain pounded ferociously at my window, and the thunder clapped fearsomely as I opened my eyes just a peek. "Uuuhhh," I groaned, pulling the blanket completely over me. Boom! I slid the comforter down my face, just enough to take a glance out of the corner of my eye, grabbed the pillow, and proceeded to hold it firmly over my head. Bam! I jumped out of bed. "Okay, okay. I was getting up anyway.", I whined. (I DON'T wake up graciously!)

The gloom of the outside seemed to obnoxiously make its way inside, much to my dismay. The shower water was cold; so cold, in fact, that I beat my all time high of showering in less than five minutes; I put syrup in my coffee, and creamer on my son's pancakes; made the kids' lunches for school, and then forgot to bring them; absent-mindedly tried to use my tripod (I'm a photographer...atleast that's what they keep telling me I am...) as an umbrella, and then got mad when I still got wet! "I should've stayed in bed!", I grumbled, mostly to myself, as I got out of the car to fix a flat; and cursed, mostly out loud, at whoever put those lug nuts on so darn tight. However, I did manage to get through the rest of my day without any major mishaps...or so I thought.

After picking the kids up from school, the day seemed to brighten. The sun came out. My children were semi-getting along, and the dog managed not to wetsy all over the floor long enough for me to push her out the door. Just minutes later, I decided it was safe to let her back in. As she sauntered up the steps into the house, I happened to notice a gorilla...(Did I say that?)...I mean, a huge, hairy man glaring back at me. "What the hell are you looking at?" After looking this beast up and down and summing up the situation, I decided it was best not to say anything, although many things innocently crossed my mind. I flashed him my best, "Kiss my beautiful behind" look and shut the door. He responded appropriately by throwing the neighbor's planter, which crashed inches from our window. Hhhhmmmm...is it possible he didn't think my behind was beautiful? Oh, well, no time to debate, the phone was ringing; hubby would be late.

After an exhausting day, I felt it was only fair to put the kids to sleep early and drown, I mean, soak myself in a bubble bath. "Much better...," I thought as I climbed out of the tub and into my favorite silk nightie. I grabbed a good book, hopped into bed, and congratulated myself on surviving another day. Crash! My heart raced! I exploded

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