by David Riel

Created on: April 11, 2007   Last Updated: April 23, 2007

Greed in families usually rears its head when the family members are most vulnerable and least able to deal with it. Because nothing trigger's greed more certainly than the disposition of a family member's estate. The prospect of an inheritance can change your loved ones into people you scarcely recognize. Family rifts can be created over items of such little financial value that it's hard to believe that anyone considers them worth mentioning, never mind fighting about.

And if a lot of money happens to be at stake, watch out. Families can be torn apart by greed, and the wounds created may never heal.

The reasons aren't entirely financial. People often see their legacy as being somehow indicative of the love the deceased family member had for them. If someone gets more of the deceased's worldly goods,they may feel - however irrational this may be - that this indicates to all the world that the decedent loved that person more.

But with proper planning the risks of greed arising after the death of a loved one can be minimized. Steps can be taken in estate planning to lower the chances of one or more family members reacting badly to the disposition of the estate's assets.

In most jurisdictions, immediate family members are entitled to see a copy of the will, prior to the assets of the estate being distributed.

The will is the trigger for a lot of family fighting. And the very worst sort of will for this is one with a long list of gifts and bequests to various family members.

These almost always cause hard feelings. And can also be quite difficult for the executor, who may also be a family member, to administer. Consider alternatives to a long list of bequests, such as leaving them all to a trusted individual with a letter of instruction as to how they'll be distributed, or, better still, giving them away while you're still alive.

Remember, a copy of the will has to be provided to all immediate family members, so if bequests and legacies are mentioned in it hard feelings may be created.

One way around this is to hold property, such as real estate, or bank accounts, jointly. These will pass to the survivor outside the estate, and so other family members need never know about them. Be sure to get legal advice however, before implementing this strategy as it may have tax and other implications.

And if you are inheriting yourself, and conflicts with other family members arise over who gets what, see if you can take this word of advice to heart. It's only money. It's only stuff. If some other family member wants it so badly they're willing to rend the fabric of the family apart to get it, consider just letting it go. In the long run, you'll be a lot happier with peace in the family, than with Uncle Harry's war medals, or Aunt Matilda's prize-winning quilt.

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