by A.R. Marth

Created on: April 11, 2007   Last Updated: April 25, 2007

I have had a non-verbal learning disorder since childhood. As you can see, this does not mean that I don't know how to communicate, or that I suffered enough to impair my adult verbal abilities. Children with non-verbal learning disorders do have some special needs that must be adressed, that may not be apparent.

A child who has trouble talking and using words will have a harder time asking you for what they need than other children will. They may not speak clearly or well, especially in noisy groups of other children. Taking the extra time to ask them in a quiet moment what they aretrying to express can help them communicate more clearly.

Non-verbal children also like to use their bodies to communicate. Making them sit still or stay in one place is the equivalent of telling a "regular" child to shut up. Allow them freedom of movement when they need it, and let them get up and stretch while they're working on tasks. The release I always got from being able to even stand up, or shimmy in my seat, was very good for my ability to concentrate when I was young. Holding still for a non-verbal child can feel like holding your breath- the urge to move can stifle any attempt too concentrate.

Learning sign language together can sometimes help, too. Many children who can't grasp language in spoken form have an easier time understanding and responding to movements and signing. This also helps you bond, and gives you the ability too speak with your child no matter how loud or distracting the environment may be.

If your child is autistic, as I am, they may have trouble controlling the tone and volume of their voice. Singing along to music, playing an instrument, and making up games which encourage them to use all levels of their vocal range are all helpful, and can be reallyy enjoyable for the child. Until I started singing, I inever understood the difference between "loud" and "soft". After many days spent singing along with my grandmother, I even learned to whisper.

Most non-verbal children have a hard time dealing with groups of other children their own age. Some autistics have a very bad reaction to loud, sudden, or high-pitched sounds, which can actually cause them physical pain. Be understanding of this, and if your child has this issue allow them time to relax both befoer and after any group outing or activity. Letting them get a few moments alone, or at least away from the noise, can help them calm down if they become agitated. Your child may be a loner, and you should remember that this is not necessarily a bad thing. Many highly-articulate children are also loners! This may be a personality quirk, and not related to their disorder.

Children "suffer" from learning disorders because the people around them often aren't willing to take the time to communicate with them properly. Realizing that your child may be gifted or brilliant despite their inability to communicate the way everyone else does goes a long way toward helping them be more comfortable. Any time you give the extra effort to understand them better, they suffer a little less, and are less afraid to attempt new way s of communicating with you.

Given lots of patience, love, and caring, non-verbal children often grow into very articulate, communicative adults. Many of us remember how hard it was to struggle for communication skills, and we are living proof that although our minds may work a bit differently, we are still happy and capable of communication.

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