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When it comes to specific differences between a child that has special needs and a child that is developing typically, a parent or guardian has to look at not only development milestones for children's age groups but also their individual child. I have a nine year old son that was diagnosed with autism at about 2 1/2 years old, I also have a 2 year old son without autism. There are lots of differences in children's' moods and behaviors that are more likely to be characteristics of a childs personality, surroundings, and upbringings that have nothing to do with ADD, ADHD, autism spectrum disorders, depression/anxiety disorder, and the like.

The first thing to do is to really look at what you as the parent or guardian see as a problematic behavior and begin a log at how often throughout the day that the child expresses the behavior/s. Now some are much more aggressive than others and some moods and behaviors can jump right out at you, and you know, now THIS is not right... but there are also alot of different types of behaviors that are much more subtle and unfortunately this is the reason why so many disorders such as those I mentioned above go unnoticed and aren't detected or diagnosed until later on. There is also of course a lot of parents who will just refuse to believe that something could be wrong with their own child, thinking that things it "just couldn't happen to them and their family". The fact is being a parent means not only to love and care for your children, to clothe, feed, shelter, and nurture them.. It also means to KNOW them and to learn about them. I think that the most important thing to understand when trying to compare a typical child and a special needs child is to understand YOUR child. No 2 children are the same just like no 2 adults, (yes that goes for twins as well!) as well as people in general INCLUDING our kids, have different expressions and reactions, as well as wants and needs.
Now when dealing with very young children, toddlers, and preschoolers, (especially for first time parents!) a great place to start is to look at "developmental milestones" for different age groups. This goes for behaviors as well as different moods and reactions. I said before no 2 children are the same, however, there ARE typical developmental and growth charts so to speak that you can look to, to see if your child is within typical age appropriate behaviors. Now I wouldn't say that a child MUST fit within the social and physical guidelines

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