by J. Audet

Created on: April 05, 2007   Last Updated: October 31, 2008

The first big decision that I made as a single mom was to know the sex of my unborn child.

To be honest, I don't remember agonizing over the decision, weighing the pros and cons or asking other moms for their advice. As a matter of fact, I don't remember actually making the decision at all. I knew from the outset that I not only would be a single mom, but I would be my child's only parent. Finding out as early as possible whether I was expecting a girl or a boy was a no-brainer under the circumstances.

My first ultra-sound left no doubt that I was having a girl. I couldn't have been more excited! Determined not to play into the whole gender-stereotype game, I planned her decor and picked out her wardrobe without using the color pink. I imagined all the adventures we would have together and dreamed of how we would be the closest mother-daughter duo since...well, I couldn't actually think of any off hand. We would be the first!

The biggest payoff, however, was that I named her when I was only four months pregnant and never once strayed or doubted or changed my mind. I referred to her by her name when I talked about her and when I spoke directly to her in utero...something I did constantly. Soon my family and friends were doing the same. I even "introduced" her by name to strangers who just happened to be in line behind me at the grocery store. I was determined to make sure her name would stick.

And stick, it did. Eleven years later, my daughter has an uncanny sense of self that she's seemed to carry with her since she was old enough to say her name.

Did I mention that her self-proclaimed "signature color" as of yesterday is pink?

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