by CJKRDG

Created on: April 04, 2007   Last Updated: April 23, 2007

Most people dream about falling in love and finding that special someone with whom to spend their lives. We all want to have loving, supportive families too. What about having a best friend?

Anne of Green Gables dreamed of having one. Remember how Anne and Diana exclaimed about being kindred spirits? The folks in Beverly Hills 90210 fought tooth and nail to get one too. Remember how often Donna was jealous over the friendship between Kelly and Brenda? Why is it so important for many people to have a best friend?

I recently conducted a poll on one of my favourite Internet message boards asking people if they truly had a "best friend". Of the 300 respondents, over 80% said yes. I was quite surprised. In my everyday life, I know some people who do have best friends, but I also know even more people who are content with having friends period. No need to classify anyone as a better friend than others. Yet, in my poll, 80% of people proudly announced that they did have a best friend who they treasured on a different level than other friends in their lives. Friendships in general have always been important to me even as important as family. I suppose that I fall into the category of people who have always had that powerful desire to have a best friend. Why is it important to many of us to have a best friend rather than simply having a lot of good friends?

In childhood, many of us may remember hearing those seductive words, "if you give me your last candy, I'll be your best friend". Ah the sheer power of those words back then! I remember falling for this bribe and actually giving that last coveted tootsie roll to some classmate whom I never talked to again. I surrendered that candy in order to gain that acceptance I was craving. That's of major significance for a self-proclaimed chocoholic! Some people may start smoking, drinking, experimenting with drugs, or having sex to gain acceptance from that best friend or any friend for that matter. Let's not even worry about which of these activities I participated in to get approval from my peers! Suffice it to say that as an adult, I realize now that bribes simply don't work. No amount of gift giving will "earn me" that best friend position. So what did it really take to have a best friend?

I remember at the age of 10 I thought I had a best friend. Tina and I were inseparable and life was pretty good. One day, a new girl arrived in our classroom and suddenly my mind believed that my "best friend status" was being threatened.

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