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The Single Life

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The benefits of being single

by Gladys

I'm recently reminded again how true the old saying, "The grass is always greener on the other side" is.

My friend is in a dilemma about his relationship with his girlfriend. Coming on to 2 years, they have no major arguments, are very good friends and share common interests. The problem is, he has decided that she's not the one he's supposed to spend the rest of his life with, and wants to move on so that he can explore "options".

So move on, I tell him. It's not as simple as that though. According to him, there's no good reason to let the relationship go. "Things are going alright, we don't have arguments, so I can't really end it. " Apparently, just deciding that she was not the one was not a strong enough reason for him to end it. At the same time, he wanted to move on; he didn't miss her when he travelled, and he felt constrained by the relationship to take advantage of the "opportunities" that had come his way.

I couldn't understand that. Wasn't that proof enough that he shouldn't invest his time and energy into something that he couldn't see himself in for the long-term? Worse, it wasn't fair for her at all. I knew that ending a relationship, no matter how disengaged you are, is never easy. Fair enough. But I also know from experience that the longer you wait, the more difficult it becomes to let go. I had been there before. How I longed to be there again sometimes. But only sometimes.

It was a good reminder for me to count my blessings as a single. I have no single person to share all my ups and downs with, but I have a handful of friends who I know I can trust with anything. I may not be able to watch that silly movie with that someone who will watch it for my sake, but I know that I also have the freedom to do my own things at my own pace without having to consult anyone. I might not be able to travel to romantic Italy with that special someone, but try going there yourself or even with a best friend. I can imagine what an experience it would be.

The grass is always greener, yes. For now, I'm content to graze in this side of the field.

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