by Mona Gallagher

Created on: April 01, 2007   Last Updated: June 21, 2008

Starting over is a huge step at any age and resilience is more important than age alone. People who are 40 and beyond have the gift of experience weighing in on their side however. When we start over, we make a deliberate choice to move forward. If we've been through difficult times before, we understand that perseverence is a good friend.

People who win at life don't win by giving up the struggle. They move forward by placing one foot in front of the other and recognizing the resources they have on hand. Life can knock you down and trample your expectations, but you have a choice of staying down or getting up and that's what defines your ability to start over.

PERSONAL LOSS

Personal loss such as the death of a loved one is a major blow to the human psyche. Death in the family can stop the desire to move forward because it often debilitates and leads to depression and hopelessness. Our loved ones are not replaceable and we have to heal before we move ahead. Relationship breakups can also be a major depressive event that saps the energy.

People who lose loved ones through physical death or the death of a relationship benefit most when they are able to grieve the loss and bring the event to closure or acceptance. Acceptance is not synonymous with forgetting, it is facing up to the event and choosing to go ahead.

LOSS OF EMPLOYMENT

Job loss is a high stress situation for all but especially for the older person. Losing a job means instant lifestyle adjustment, depression and possibly bitterness depending on the events that led to loss of a job or career. In a youth driven culture, an older person may feel intimidated by the job searching process and afraid of losing home and family.

Depression is common for people who lose their jobs, and tempers flare in the home piling stress upon stress in the home. In these trying times, support is a necessary support pillar for starting over. A support group of peers can give you a boost through understanding and providing practical advice on how to move through the loss.

For the older person, it is more difficult to land a job in an environment where educational requirements and technology define qualifications. One of the best things an older person can do to become marketable is to learn and upgrade their technical skills. The computer isn't going away from the workplace, so its time to upgrade skills if necessary.

Options for the persons starting over at 40, 50, and 60 are abundant as long as you have the will to move forward. It's a fact that retirees are starting their own businesses after working for someone else all their lives. If retirees can do it, so can you.

Whatever you think of senior citizens, it is important to remember that all have different levels of expertise, knowledge, and personal vision. People with vision look to the future more than they look back at the past. Starting over is not easy, but if you have or can develop a personal vision for you life, you'll find direction.

Faith is a vital component in our lives. Some base faith on their personal abilities and expertise while others seek a friend and help in God. Add faith to your vision and see what happens if you find yourself in a position of starting over.

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