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receiving the next request for contact information. Hmmm, maybe she's right. Swallow hard, give out the information, start a conversation. Next thing you know, the idiot wants to send me a picture of his penis. Baaammm! Here we go again.

And then theres the phone. I admit it, Im phone phobic. I know, most women love the phone. They are always talking to someone. It seems the phone is permanently attached to their ears. Me? Nope, not really. Now there are, of course, exceptions to this. I love it when my daughter calls especially if I haven't talked to her in awhile. And I love it when someone I'm seeing calls me. If we've met in person and things have gone well thats a different story I suppose. I just find it very awkward to call someone I've never met and try to carry on a conversation.

So how to overcome these obstacles? Jumping right back on the horse doesn't seem to work for me. For every pleasant experience there are more bad ones. Not to mention the flip flops my stomach does. I actually start to feel panic. Ridiculous isn't it? Or is it? Little children stick their hands on the burner, burn their hands and learn not to touch the burner. Is it so different? And yet, I want to overcome them. I feel like an idiot most of the time. It seems absolutely ridiculous to me that I can't just shrug off the crap anymore.

Don't misunderstand, I'm not scared of a new relationship. Not at all. In fact, I miss being in a relationship. I'm not a serial dater. I'd love to find that one person to spend my time with. I miss the companionship and the intimacy. So how do I get there from here? I guess that's up to anyone who is truly interested. Be patient, be content with getting to know me a little bit through email before rushing to IM or phone conversations. It could just be worth it in the end..

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