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Quote: "Help me to be careful of the toes I step on today as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow".

I don't know who wrote that. But I wholeheartedly agree. So how do you do it? How do you leave a job without letting them all know what you thought of them? The first step is in the wording of your resignation. Finding a nice way out is sometimes difficult. A few excuses I have used if I didn't have another job to go to are: (a) I am leaving this position regrettably as my partner is moving inter state for a promotion. (when you run into them later,you simply explain the position fell through). (b) Due to family commitments I no longer feel able to offer this position 100%. (young children, sick mother or school commitments for your children are all o.k. here) (c)I am tendering my resignation as I now wish to follow a different direction with my career and would like to give the company the opportunity to fill my position with someone committed to fulfilling the ideals of the company.

Of course if you have another job to go to this is much easier with your excuses all relating to career progression, having been offered a wonderful opportunity, higher pay, more responsibility etc etc.....

Another thing to consider when writing your resignation is to thank the company for the opportunities this position has provided you and the lessons you have learned. Whether you realize it at this point or not working in that particular working environment taught you allot. It may be valuable lessons about working for family run businesses in the future or it may be valuable lessons for how to deal with a megalomaniac. Whatever the position you learned something. I once had a position where I learned how to pop someones elbow joint out..... I'm sure it'll come in handy one day.

Once you hand in that resignation remember to tell every employee, customer or mailman who asks you why you're leaving... exactly what you put in your resignation letter. This will ensure that there is no way the boss will find out it's because you thought his management style was a mixture of Ghengis Khan crossed with the unibomber. Thus keeping that bridge firmly intact.

Of course the best reason for keeping those bridges unburnt is because you never know when that boss may be called upon to comment on your performance. The other reason I have found is because often someone you hate in one organization could turn out to be your best friend at the next job you work together. Every position has it's tensions and stresses and they may just be a victim of a stressful situation themselves and not really the maniacal control freak you at first thought.

So leave every job with your dignity and your chances for a good reference intact.

Learn more about this author, Kyra Patterson.
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