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I believe the majority of human action is based on fear. It prompts us to new actions, or it holds us back. That can be good or bad in both instances depending on the circumstances. Unfortunately, it is more often that we hold back because of fear than the other way around.

I keep the phrase around my house: "If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got." I don't know who originated this phrase, but I keep it up to remind me, and members of my family, that it shows a distinct lack of intelligence to repeat actions that are not getting you anywhere. It's also very human. We like our ruts - they're comfortable in their familiarity. Unfortunately, they also hold us back from making good changes in our lives.

Overcoming fear of change requires several things. One is a realization that change is inevitable. Change will come: we can let it happen to us, or we can take charge and make changes as needed. If we take that risk, we are responsible for what happens. This is often the base fear in not wanting to change. We know that and don't want to take responsibility. We want to blame God, or fate, or our parents, or anything except ourselves. What they don't realize is that there is power in taking responsibility for our own actions. Whether we choose to take responsibility or not, we are making a choice - to act, or not to act when a choice comes up.

Another aspect of overcoming fear of change is to recognize when something is not working. I'm not saying to bail at the first sign of trouble, but there comes a time when you realize you are repeatedly hitting your head against a wall. When you realize this, you can keep getting a headache, or you can look for a window or door, or just simply turn around and go the other way. Often, just turning to look around will give you a new viewpoint on the situation. You will find a path you never thought of before because you were too busy banging your head against the wall to see it.

Overcoming fear of change often just requires putting one foot in front of the other and walking through it to the other side. Fear is a basic part of our everyday lives. We can't always get rid of it, but we can always choose to act anyway. Someone once said bravery is not the absence of fear, but acting in spite of fear.

In the end, we often look back to find that our fears were baseless anyway. We tend to build up these stories in our head about the possible outcomes rather than stepping out to find out the real outcome. So, overcoming fear of change, requires that we stop predicting the future and go out and live it. It is only by making those changes (which can be changed again if they don't work) and doing what we know we can do, that we find fear dissipating in the victory of accomplishment

Learn more about this author, Angela S. Young.
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