by Alias

Created on: March 28, 2007   Last Updated: July 27, 2009

You can make your partner happy without sacrificing your happiness!

Let me just be the first to say that I am a woman that struggles with consistent unhappiness. My husband, try as he might, always seems to end up being on "my list". I have looked back over my life and have come to the realization that this started a long long time ago.

I'm a daddy's girl. My father spoiled me. I had a hell of a time understanding why, once I was out of the house and on my own, why men didn't treat me the same way that my dad did. I didn't always get every single thing I wanted, well, not until I kicked and screamed long enough. I carried that mentality with me, and for a long time. All I wanted was for a man to treat me as well as my father did. Was that asking for too much? Yes, it was. First of all, I wasn't dating my father and I sure didn't marry him. I consistently compared how they treated me to how my dad did. Well, the truth be told, my dad didn't treat my mom like a queen when I was growing up either.

I read a book one time called "The Five Love Languages". I'm telling all of you who have happened upon this article to go and buy the book. I'm telling you, men and women alike, it has helped me tremendously over the last few years. I wouldn't be married today if I hadn't read that book.

I've become my father. I have a daughter today. She's almost 12 years old and boy do I have her ruined already for the man she'll one day marry. She already thinks that she's to be treated as a queen. You see, what she doesn't understand yet, and what it took me a long time to realize, is that being told yes all the time wasn't love- it was quite the opposite. Once I grew up and had to face the world on my own, that caused me alot of hurt and resentment towards men. My husband is a wonderfully resilient and understanding man, thank God. Communication is the key here.. and the book I mentioned will do wonders!

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